An Inkling of Distrust
by hahanowyougetit
Summary: Laughter, dark heinious laughter, wicked twisted laughter pouring into every cell in my body. The source is close, I just cant muster where it comes from. Like a dream or a far off memory. It overwhelms me, I cant think, it crushes me until I can barely breathe. Then, its gone, was it ever really there? I dont know. Some times I just dont know. Roxas focused.


**A/n: So my other story got deleted as you probably didn't know. But hey here is a new one for you all. So enjoy and review if ya wanna.**

Laughter, dark heinous laughter, wicked twisted laughter pouring into every cell in my body. The source is close, I just cant muster where it comes from. Like a dream or a far off memory. It overwhelms me, I cant think, it crushes me until I can barely breathe. Then, its gone, was it ever really there? I don't know. Some times I just don't know.

* * *

"Cloud, its seriously getting old dude," I mutter pushing past him.

"Ahhh, c'mon Rox, if you weren't so afraid all the time it wouldn't get old," he says.

Cloud,my overly annoying completely obnoxious not even sure if he really is brother, has this habit of waiting for me to turn a corner and scaring me. He's right though I should be used to it by now after living with him for 19 years.

"Don't listen to him, Roxas, if a face like that was waiting around a corner for me I'd get scared too." Leon chimes in from across the room.

My brother fakes pain covering his chest like he'd been stabbed. "Oh how you wound me dear lover." Oh yeah, forgot to mention my brother is probably the biggest queen I've ever met in my entire life. Oh well at least i wont have to deal with his children I nearly shudder at the thought.

I shake my head at the dramatics and continue down the hall and open the door to my room. Somethings off I cant really tell what it is but i check behind the door and under the bed just in case. After one more scan around the room i go over to my computer and turn on my monitor I check all of my social networking sites, though I don't know why. All it consist of is me scrolling down, each new post fueling my hate for all of humanity. Each day i grow more and more sick of every other person around me. If people weren't so stupid all the time I wouldn't hate them so much. Something flutters in my peripheral and i glance over. Nothing's there, of course. The so called specialist call it paranoia but i know someones watching me, waiting for me to let my guard down and then they will strike. I won't though, I never will they wont get me no one can hurt me I'm smarter than them. I'm smarter than everyone. I close out the site and turn the monitor off and get up to lock my door, and get my shoe box out of my closet. I look at my goody bags and peek over my shoulder. No one is there, and I hear the shower running so I figure either Cloud or Leon or worse, both of them were in there. It's safe. I grab my weed and pipe.

After a few bowls I'm beyond high so I go outside, ignoring the questions from Cloud. I love being high. It's only when I'm high I feel truly sober. I don't get so scared, and the thoughts of wanting humanity to disappear go away. I hate that I'm so angry, I hate that I hate so much. Everyone else has it so easy. I can't even walk into a room to make sure people aren't out there. I dont know why I am the way I am, but I hate it. Its like there is two people inside of me in this ever constant battle. Good versus evil, Light versus Dark. Even then it's still me fighting myself. Sometimes I wonder if my parents were alive would I still be like this. It doesn't matter, I still hate so much, I even hate hating.I wish i could make everyone go away. Then I could be alone with this battle and maybe one side would overcome and finally end it.

I arrive at the park and walk past the playground. At the end of this park is a small wooded area. I go there sometimes to get away from people. There is a creek that runs through these woods. I follow it until it forks going towards the right where it pools off into a small pond like place. No one has ever been here before. Until now that is. There is a shrouded figure facing away from me.

'_No! No one is supposed to be here! This place is mine_.' I shout mentally.

The person turns and looks at me beneath their hood. "Oh, but Roxas," it's a mans voice speaking to me "No one can own nature. She owns us, everything around you is her doing."

He's reading my mind?! That's impossible. I must be imagining, the doctors said I could eventually personify my twisted reality until it takes shape. That has to be it. The hooded man is walking over now.

"No Roxas I am real as real as the trees and the grass beneath your feet." He's talking as if he's in love with the plants.I turn around to try and run away, but my legs aren't working. Looking down I notice my legs are covered in tendrils of snake like vines. I pull at them trying to break free. It isn't working. I have no idea what is going on. This cant be real. Things like this don't happen. The man in the black coat is now in front of me. He raises his hands and I flinch away. Surely this man is going to hurt me. He takes off his hood to reveal his face, and... pink hair?

"My name is Marluxia, and I am here to help you," this Marluxia says if that's really his name anyway.

"I don't want your help," I plead, "I want you to let me go."

He smiles a sort of sad smile. Like what I've said has hurt him. "What if I told you I can give you unimaginable strength? The power to make the things that scare you go away, the power to overcome the battle of the opposing forces raging inside of you."

What is this guy talking about? He's crazy! How does he know these things about me?

"What do you want from me?' I ask straining to sound like I'm not about to burst into tears.

"Let me show you." He raise his hand towards my head. He touches my temple and then my vision goes black. What is happening to me? What is he doing? "Don't fight this Roxas. I'm showing you the real you." There it is. My vision is back, but I'm in a totally different place. I watch as another shrouded figure swinging what looks to be a big key. Maybe a sword. I decide to call it a key sword. He is swinging it at these black creatures with yellow eyes. He's ripping them apart, they turn into dust and what looks to be a heart floats up into the sky. All of the monsters are gone and the person turns looking right at me. He takes off his hood to reveal, that he is... Me? He, no I, no we break into a huge beaming smile. The sort of smile I've always been envious of. The smile i never could muster.

Does he know I'm watching him? He nods. Woah... that's kind of freaky. This has got to be a trick some sort of drug maybe. He shakes his head. How do these people know what I'm thinking? Is this really me? From the future? Telling me to go with this man. He nods vigorously now. Just like that it's gone, and I'm back in the woods. The pink haired man lowers his arms.

"Did you like what you see?" He inquires, "Hope it was better than what I saw when the Organization recruited me." He shudders seemingly at the mere thought of whatever it was he saw.

"The Organization?" I question. "What's that."

"I can't tell you until you agree to come with me, but we can help you. We can make you strong. We can help you overcome the darkness, help you control it and make the shadows in the corner of your eye run away"

What is he talking about? He is even more crazy than I am. "I am not coming with you. You're crazy and this is fucking stupid. Quit toying with me! Who put you up to this?"

The man heaves a heavy sigh. "Fine, I won't push you. For now this is goodbye, but be sure I'll see you soon Roxy." A strange smoke appears behind him arching up like a doorway. He backs into it slowly and it vanishes into thin air. The vines around my legs are gone. Who am I kidding, they probably weren't ever there. I breathe for what feels like the first time in an eternity I look for the man called Marluxia, but he's gone. Like a ghost he'd vanished through the black smoke. I run home as fast as my shaky legs would carry me. I bust through the door and into the living room. I try to tell Cloud what happened but every time I try to talk nothing but jumbled syllables come out.

"Roxas?" My brother says with a little more than a hint of worry "Are you OK? What happened? Leon, get in here!"

Leon, who was apparently still in the shower, runs in with a towel around his hips. "What is it?" Then he notices me. "Roxas, what's wrong dude? You look like you saw a ghost."

I take a few breaths to calm my nerves. I explain what happened at the pond, about the man named Marluxia, the visions, and the black smoke. The entire time I'm telling them, they look concerned Its the same look when I tell them someone followed me home, or that the man across the street wants to kill me. It's the "I feel bad for my crazy little brother, man, what a nut case" look. I, of course, realize how insane it sounds but everything felt so real. More real that anything that's ever happened to me.

"Roxas, it didn't happen, it's impossible.." Leon starts, but I cut him off.

"No, it was real. It did happen, the man was there. He wanted me to go to this place called "The Organization Please believe me," I'm practically begging for them to listen at this point.

"Roxas," Cloud says, "It can't have happened. You haven't been gone for more than thirty seconds."

"What are you talking about? That's ridiculous." It's impossible. I know what I saw. I look at the clock. 4:30. I just got out of school ten minutes ago. "No, no this cant be happening. That's... That's crazy."

"Roxas its fine you're safe" Leon, still dripping wet, tries to soothe me "Why dont you go lie down. I'll make you tea."

I look at both of them. The worry is etched in to their features. Cloud's forehead is all crinkled, he really looks like my dad right now. I nod and get up to go to my room. I pull out the shoe box again and grab my suicide bag. It's a bag of a bunch of different types of pill that I keep in case it just gets too much. I pull out an Ambien and within minutes I'm drifting away to the land of dreams.

* * *

"Damn it, Marly! Why can you do anything right?"

"Look I'm sorry Saix, I could let him run away," Marluxia apologizes.

"So the only thing you could do is keep him prisoner with a bunch of stupid vines? You know what, I know just who to send in to get him. whether it be by force, or... other ways of persuasion. Marluxia, bring the the Flurry of Dancing Flames." The blue haired man commands.

Marluxia rolls his eyes but still he gets up "Axel, Where are you?"

* * *

**Well, there yah have it the first chapter of An Inkling of Distrust.  Dont forget your reviews 8D**


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